End Of Year Giving

Thursday, December 28, 2017

Usually around the time of year, we donate a super small sum of cash to a couple different non-profit organizations. Simon has a few groups he feels strongly about, I have a few, so we divvy it up and do our best to make some sort of small impact. 

But this year, I am lost. The world is dramatically different than it was at this time last year and the issues seem to have multiplied with the need to help pressing more heavily than ever. I have no idea how to do something. I could have millions of extra dollars and would still feel confused about how to effect change. Sure, my $100 contribution is unlikely to really shift any of these things, but I'm just completely and utterly despondent. It feels like there are thousands more people at risk, hundreds more urgent issues threatening from every direction, and dozens more nauseating daily news headlines. 

But then I talked to my husband, the guy who works for a community foundation and often advises donors on how to match their interests with non-profits. Um, duh. We had lunch one day last week, I explained this feeling to him and he helped connect some of my concerns with organizations in our area that address those issues.

For example, I've been thinking a lot about media as related to its effect on the election, post-election issues, and truth. I've also always felt that social media plays a big role in reducing people's empathy toward one and other. Without empathy, how do we bridge the increasingly polarized political divide to understand other perspectives and converse about compromise? So yeah, how on earth could I direct a gift to increase empathy? Well, a local NH organization, Media Power Youth teaches youth how to make the connection and distinction between media messages and impact and their own lives and actions. They learn to think critically about what they see and hear and how to responsibly engage and participate in social media. Boom!

Or concern about growing economic disparity. The New Hampshire Fiscal Policy Institute is dedicated to promoting public policies that foster economic opportunity for all NH residents. Or concern about how immigration policies may be effecting some residents. Catholic Charities of NH has immigration and refugee services that provide support, guidance, and legal representation for various immigrant related issues.

These are just a few examples of how amazing Simon is at his job but also how there are organizations and people working on things that are seemingly unsolvable and overwhelming. Obviously none of these places are going to march into the White House and fix it all, but they are working every day to help the people these policies and laws negatively effect right here in NH.

That's worth $100 any day.

Merry Christmas!

Monday, December 25, 2017

1 Merwin 'Til Christmas

Sunday, December 24, 2017

The Santa snuggler.
(Pose and photo credit to Pete)

2 Merwins 'Til Christmas

3 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Friday, December 22, 2017

4 Merwins 'Til Christmas

5 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

6 Merwins 'Til Christmas

7 Merwins 'Til Christmas

8 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Sunday, December 17, 2017

9 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Saturday, December 16, 2017

10 Merwins 'Til Christmas

11 Merwins 'Til Christmas

12 Merwins 'Til Christmas

13 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

14 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Monday, December 11, 2017

15 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Sunday, December 10, 2017

16 Merwins 'Til Christmas

17 Merwins 'Til Christmas

18 Merwins 'Til Christmas

19 Merwins 'Til Christmas

20 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Scratch that. Pillow series continues. Apparently, he enjoys these pillows.

21 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Monday, December 4, 2017

We will end this here. With the head on the pillow tray.

22 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Pillow Series #3. Really smushing himself right in there.

23 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Catching Up On 24 Merwins 'Til Christmas

Friday, December 1, 2017

I was so proud of myself before heading out for vacation Thanksgiving Day. Amidst the packing and planning whirl, I had successfully scheduled Merwin Christmas Countdown posts for every day we'd be away! Alas, I returned from our Argentinian adventure to find that none of them actually posted. So now I will frantically try to get us up to speed with counting down this glorious holiday season. I believe this is the seventh time I've created this ridiculousness. Of all things, I am most certainly a creature of habit so while it is truly an absurd way to lead in to the holiday season, at this point, it can't be changed. If only going to the gym worked like that. Anyway, happy holidays.

Here begins the pillow series.

Right Now I'm Watching

Friday, November 17, 2017

I may be slightly obsessed with all things British. Until we shifted back to Portsmouth, this obsession took the form of books. But now that I'm reunited with my TV, I've delved into the delicious world of the BBC, specifically mystery British TV series. It's best if they are period dramas, but I'm starting to work my way toward shows set in the present day.

Right now, though, I am captivated by Endeavour. Set in the 1960s, the show chronicles the early years of Inspector Morse in Oxford, England (duh). You may know that the television show Inspector Morse was a huge hit across the pond, running from 1987-2000. Endeavour is its prequel so we get a young version of the Inspector just as he is finding his way on the police force, already leaps and bounds above the others in his detecting skills.

The mysteries are always a mystery to me until the very end. Some tiny moments of romance and a slow reveal of tidbits from his past slowly gives the show (and its characters) a personality that makes you want to binge it. I'm in the midst of series three, but all four 4-episode series are available to stream for free on Amazon Prime. Give it a try!

Lives Of Purpose

Thursday, November 16, 2017

I keep hearing the same advertisement on Pandora. It's a few kids talking about what private schools they will soon be attending and how well a particular private elementary school prepared them. A narrator mentions that the school grooms children to have "lives of purpose." Possibly it's the manner in which she says those words, but I find my feathers ruffled every time I hear it.

Obviously I don't have children so maybe that makes me immediately disqualified from commenting. Maybe it's obvious that every parent's main goal is to have children with "lives of purpose." I don't know about that, but I can comment on society's obsession with "purpose" and "meaning." Why has having "purpose" became an end all be all measure by which we judge success? Why can't we just be happy? Everything is go go go, achieve achieve achieve, do more more more. 

Capitalism plays a role. In our current society, having money equals power, having power equals success, having success equals everything. But to what end? And at what expense? Why do we work so hard? It seemed that there was a time when you could have a job, leave the job at 5pm, and have enough to have a home, enough to make ends meet, enough to be well-respected and appreciated. Now everyone is always "so busy," stress is more common than non-stress, and it's a constant rat race just to come out even. There has to be a backlash at some point...right?

In my time not working (at least in the traditional 9-5 sense), I've noticed a shift in myself. When people first asked what I was doing with my time, I quickly mentioned that I was working with a career counselor, doing some consulting, and learning yoga. I felt pressure to name accomplishments, ensure others that I was doing something to "stay in the game." Why? Why couldn't it be okay for me to be reading crappy books and floating on the raft in the sun? I was happy. Happier than I'd been in a  long time. Why did I feel the constant need to demonstrate "success?" I've started to admit that my summer was for me, for my relaxation and rejuvenation, and admitting that I read historical romances, colored mandalas, and enjoyed being with my dog.

There are more layers to this. For example, somehow women are supposed to have demanding, high-powered jobs and also be amazing mothers. Don't get me wrong, I am enormously grateful for the fact that being part of the workforce is even an option for women, but it sure would be nice if caregiver policies caught up, the impossibility of one-earner households would be addressed, and the continued prevailing notion that if you're not a mother, you're not a woman might be challenged.

All I'm saying is that I think it is 100% legitimate and even the best option for some people to just be. To not choose a path where long hours and stress are pushing you up the rungs of a hierarchical ladder. To not strive for some greater purpose, deep meaning, or extreme success.  

At lunch with a friend earlier this week, we chatted about this very notion. She said she thought it was time for a revolution. So take a deep breath. Drop the expectations and the pressures and the external motivations. Know that you being you is enough. Or try anyway. It's all easier said than done.

A Poem For A Thursday

Thursday, November 2, 2017

Peace
C.K. Williams

We fight for hours, through dinner, through the endless evening, who
        even knows now what about,
what could be so dire to have to suffer so for, stuck in one another's craws
        like fishbones,
the cadavers of our argument dissected, flayed, but we go on with it, to
        bed, and through the night,
feigning sleep, dreaming sleep, hardly sleeping, so precisely never touch-
        ing, back to back,
the blanket bridged across us for the wintry air to tunnel down, to keep
        us lifting, turning,
through the angry dark that holds us in its cup of pain, the arching dark,
        the weary dark,
then, toward dawn, I can't help it, though justice won't I know be served,
        I pull her to me,
and with such accurate, graceful deftness she rolls to me that we arrive
        embracing our entire lengths.

This isn't generally the kind of poem I'm drawn to, but there was something about it that I really liked. It made me recall one of my own poems about an argument and how the tension played out in a sleeping couple. For some reason, I had used music and sound images - staccatos, crescendos, violin strings, and the rattling annoyance of a radiator. This poet did a better job winding together these images to portray that jumbled, icky, roiling gut feeling of fighting then living with someone we love.

I initially found a lot of war-like language and imagery in "Peace," but on later readings, I saw references back to their dinner with words like fishbones, cadavers, dissected, and flayed. Also interesting how these words could describe dinner or the battlefield, which in this case, may be one and the same. 

The repetition of "sleeping" helps the reader feel that endless pain of not being able to rest amidst the context of disagreement. He does that again by repeating the images of the darkness. How amazing is "the angry dark that holds us in its cup of pain?" Love it. Then it's done, as these things often are, and they embrace. This is something I imagine we've all experienced and like artists do, the poet is able to capture it so accurately and beautifully, forcing us right back to those moments and those feelings.

Book Report - Lady Darby Series

Friday, October 27, 2017

I just started the fourth book in the Lady Darby historical mystery series, A Study In Death. I'm reading this on my Kindle instead of listening to the audiobook as I did for the first three installments. I miss the charming British accent of the narrator though caught myself trying to sound British in my head as I clicked through the pages. Ha!

This series includes many of the desirable traits I'm clamoring to find in reading material lately. As usual, I've dug my claws into a rather specific genre and don't appear to be giving up anytime soon. Not just historical fiction. Not just historical mystery. Not just historical mysteries set in England anywhere from 1800-1950. Not just British mysteries depicting this time period that are series. They also need to include a thread of romance between main characters that continues from book to book. 

Which brings us back to Lady Darby. We meet Kiera after her miserable marriage to Sir Anthony ends as a result of his death. He was an anatomist who married her for her artistic ability then forced her to draw his dissections. As a result, she's shunned from society (didn't take much to get the cut direct back then!). In the first installment, she's working alongside handsome investigator Lord Sebastian Gage to prove her own innocence in a murder. They continue to dig around darker and darker cases side by side in each subsequent book. 

With the exception of #2, Mortal Arts, I've been in the dark about the culprit until the bitter end. These are well-written and seemingly historically accurate novels that provide a glimpse of life in Edinburgh in the mid 19th century as well as intriguing cases and nice character development of Kiera, Sebastian, and other minor players.

All in all, there are 5 published novels in the series (and a novella) with a sixth due out in early 2018. If you like murder, history, and all things British-y, I highly recommend you dive in!

Notes From The Travel Journal - Bar Harbor, Maine

Tuesday, October 24, 2017


We found ourselves the lucky recipients of an all-expenses paid weekend in Bar Harbor so took full advantage and hightailed it up there Friday afternoon. Our complimentary stay at the Bar Harbor Inn and Spa included two nights, a dinner in their famed Reading Room Restaurant, breakfasts, and two massages. Whoop! 

The hotel was one of those classic Maine resorts perched on the water's edge in downtown Bar Harbor. Stunning views of the harbor and surrounding islands which we experienced first hand Saturday morning when my eyes snapped open at 6:30am to a jaw-dropping sunrise (and a huge cruise ship right outside our window). It was a great start to our time in such a beautiful little slice of America.


We knew we wanted to hike in Acadia National Park on Saturday but weren't sure which of the dozens of trails to pick, especially considering I wasn't certain how my knee would hold up. Google to the rescue where I happened upon Joe's Guide to Acadia National Park, a handy outline of available treks, their difficulty, and some creative ways to connect trails for longer day trips. We hemmed and hawed (and gobbled down delicious poached eggs and blueberry stuffed French toast) before deciding on North Bubble and Conners Nubble

The adventure did not disappoint. Two and a half hours of vista bliss. The climbing wasn't difficult and the hike took us through pine and fir forest, lakeside bogs, bare granite mountainside, and stunning views of the changing leaves. It was heavenly. 


At the risk of sounding utterly ridiculous, I highly recommend ending a long day of hiking with a massage followed by a yummy dinner overlooking the harbor glittering under a starry sky. Right. Anyway. We were addicted to Acadia and headed back into the park on Sunday for a quick drive up Cadillac Mountain (don't judge) and a much shorter but pleasant on-foot trek up Flying Mountain over on the "quiet side" of Mount Dessert Island. It was great to get another walk in before stopping off at the Bass Harbor Lighthouse then making the drive home. We detoured to Foulmouthed Brewery in Portland for a celebratory beer flight (Vanilla Stout - yum) before reuniting with a squealy Merwin back home.

The entire weekend was magical. When I'm lacing up the hiking boots, I'm always a little hesitant but as soon as I take the first steps into the woods or onto the mountain, it feels amazing. The air, the quietness, the views. It's like I forget how invigorating and refreshing it feels to move and to move in such beautiful places. I love it. I can't wait for more!

Mount Roberts And The Cotton Valley Rail Trail

Tuesday, October 17, 2017



We journeyed over to the Ossipee Mountains on Saturday for a hike up Mount Roberts (elevation 2582), the western most peak in the range. More gorgeous views of Lake Winnipesaukee and the surrounding areas and a great workout. The colors were out and so were the people - we encountered two different large groups of hikers, seemingly part of the "52 With A View" club. I guess "Over the Hill" hikers came up with this list of 52 mountains as a way to draw attention to New Hampshire's great peaks that are between 2,500 and 4,000 feet in elevation. When you complete them all you get a patch. Man, that's a lot of work just for a patch.

Anyway, we did our best to avoid the groups and had a really amazing time. It was tiring and tough on my legs, but the old knee held up and the views were well worth the effort.


Though it started gloomy, by late morning Sunday was sunny and warm so we explored the Cotton Valley Rail Trail, a walking path set alongside old railroad tracks from Wakefield to Wolfeboro. Completely flat, no big deal right? Wrong. Might have been the shoes or just the body, but the knee pain struck at about mile 5 and the last 3 miles were tough. Climbing a mountain. No problem. Walking in a straight line. No good. Go figure.

Aside from that, it was a great discovery. Wonderfully maintained trail through woods, bogs, and meadows (we saw moose tracks!), all especially beautiful this time of year. Definitely want to give it another go...definitely in a different pair of shoes.